How I learn from my mistakes and failures in my writing

This year, I’m choosing to be thankful for, and learn from, my mistakes and failures. Especially in my writing.

The last few years have been full of challenges.

And change.

And loss.

Not to be overly pessimistic, but I’ve lost 3 family members in two years. Plus a couple pets. And friends.

Anyhow! I am not a pessimistic person, and I choose to focus on the way my failures and mistakes can shape me and help me move forward.

I have had “wins” this year – several contest awards – and I find that I still make mistakes and continue to fail in areas of my life. Not winning, not getting a contract, can be daunting. But my focus is on how to use, and learn from, my mistakes and failures.

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How do I learn from my mistakes and failures?

What’s so inspiring about mistakes and failures? How can I be grateful for them, let alone welcome them? Can’t I just focus on the good and ignore the bad?

Well, I’m convinced that mistakes and failures are how we learn and grow. Think about it this way – a first grader learning to read often can’t sound out a word, or mispronounces it. Is that a failure?

Or a new writer head-hops, queries before the manuscript is finished, doesn’t win in a contest, or gets a bad review. Are those mistakes?

How can we be grateful for – and even embrace – mistakes and failures?

Use mistakes and failures as steppingstones

F. Scott Fitzgerald said, “All good writing is swimming under water and holding your breath.”

He had a point. Writing is HARD! How long can you hold your breath while swimming underwater?

I’m not very good at it, but have you ever heard of free divers? They don’t get to the point they can hold their breath underwater for 10 minutes the first time they try!

Practice, practice, practice. And more practice.

I can use times of mistakes or failures, as steppingstones into something else or something new. Instead of looking back constantly and keeping track of what I didn’t do, I can look forward. I can step off the mistake, lay down the failure, and get on with my life.

Learn through persistence

Science fiction author Octavia E. Butler said, “You don’t start out writing good stuff. You start out writing crap and thinking it’s good stuff, and then gradually you get better at it. That’s why I say one of the most valuable traits is persistence.”

Persistence is defined as: firm or obstinate continuance in a course of action in spite of difficulty or opposition.

Ouch!

Writing has so many difficulties and opposition! So being persistent in writing might mean I plan time for mistakes and failures. Does that sound crazy?

I don’t think so. I think we should be realistic. Recognizing ahead of time that things might not go as planned or might even fall apart is less cynical and more intentional. Understanding that we may have down times, seasons that aren’t as productive or successful, can help us to persist.

Keep mistakes and failures in perspective

Good writing is like a windowpane.” George Orwell understood perspective. Because if we look through that windowpane, we see truth and reality.

If we keep things in perspective, how does that change anything? Well, look back at that first grader learning to read. We, as parents or grandparents, know that he will eventually learn how to do it. We don’t criticize him for not knowing exactly how to the first (or twentieth) time.

I remember watching my four-year-old granddaughter play soccer for the first time. That soccer season a number of goals were made, but in the wrong net and for the wrong team! It happens. Sometimes we kick it in and get the point, and sometimes we kick it in and realize we got turned around and the other team scored.

Perspective, the way I look at things, can help me as learn from my mistakes and failures . Perspective, to me, is looking at my life and giving myself the advice or criticism I might give a friend.

A lifestyle of gratitude

So, in this month of thankfulness, I challenge you to be grateful for your mistakes and failures. I plan to learn from my mistakes and failures by looking back and seeing what kind of steppingstones they were, being persistent, and keeping things in perspective.

As Charles Dickens said, “Reflect upon your present blessings, of which every man has plenty; not on your past misfortunes, of which all men have some.” Let’s finish out this year without regrets and look ahead to practicing a lifestyle of gratitude.

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Hi, I’m Jen! I’ve been married 37 years, have 5 amazing kids and 2 adorable grandkids and one on the way. I homeschooled our three youngest children. I used to blog about homeschooling and taught Oral Communication as an adjunct instructor for over 5 years.

Jen Dodrill Writes is born of a passion of mine – to write a novel! When I’m not working, you’ll find me writing, spending time with my family, or curled up on the couch reading and drinking a mug of dark roast coffee. (Don’t forget to check out my mug shop – JDMugs!)